The Difference Between Confidence and Arrogance

As people work their way through programs like Attracting Greatness or SNAP: Getting Unstuck In Your Life one of the common questions we get is around self-confidence.

For many people, they were brought up to be considerate, treat everyone as equal and do not look down upon others no matter what your opinion of your own abilities.

While this is sage advice, it somehow is interpreted by most people as a negative to continually improve yourself, become better everyday and share your confidence with the world because that may offend someone else.

So, the challenge is how to build your self-confidence without being arrogant.

Confidence Is Not Based On How You Rank In Relation To Others

We fall into a trap of measuring our own abilities and capabilities based on comparison with others.  This, of course, takes us down the slippery slope of having to constantly decide we are better or worse than others which leads to the conflict of having to somehow build our self-confidence while balancing this constant comparison of ourselves in relation to others (thus making us appear to be putting ourselves above others)

This is a no-win situation.

Instead, your measure of your own development, improvement, capabilities and progress should be based entirely on your own beliefs, passion, purpose and compass with limitless possibilities.

There is no reason to continually compare yourself to others.

You can definitely use the stories, experiences and achievements of others to build belief and certainty helping you get to the next level in your life, but there should be no reason to ever compare yourself to others or in any way get involved in a pattern of beliefs around how you “rank” with others.

Here is a much healthier (and far more effective) perspective on life.

My daily goal is to improve my ability to be true to my beliefs and purpose in life allowing me to improve my contribution to those around me and society at large which includes the ability to see and learn from the best in everyone.

You see, pretty much everyone out there has something of value that they can teach you and share with the world…even if on first appearance you don’t see it.

If you are truly a strong, self-confident, smart and skilled person you will realize that everyone has something to teach you – the entire world is a giant learning ground and that looking down or disrespecting anyone’s place or skills in this society is simply a sign that you yourself have not developed as far as is possible.

Taking this perspective, you are free to continually develop your own expertise in all areas of your life, you are open to the best part of everyone and if the chances of you appearing arrogant or distant is far smaller – a problem you no longer have to deal with from within because your perspective is open to all.