Comments on: 5 Ways To Attract People To You http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/ Everyday Personal Development Tips Sat, 04 Feb 2012 14:07:49 +0000 hourly 1 By: Pri http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10367 Pri Thu, 22 Dec 2011 17:57:01 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10367 Manish: Giving up life is not the only option you have! When it comes to people, take my advice, JUST DON'T BOTHER THEM!!! you should just be the way you are... why give up something as PRECIOUS as life?? You should also think about those people who love you... your family and friends... so, chill buddy!! people who talk about ending life are cowards, I am sure you are NOT! so chill out! :) Manish: Giving up life is not the only option you have! When it comes to people, take my advice, JUST DON'T BOTHER THEM!!! you should just be the way you are… why give up something as PRECIOUS as life?? You should also think about those people who love you… your family and friends… so, chill buddy!! people who talk about ending life are cowards, I am sure you are NOT! so chill out! :)

]]> By: Monika jain http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10363 Monika jain Thu, 15 Dec 2011 11:01:21 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10363 Hey jeff::::::m very upset wid mah attitude towards::oother:::::::::i m always der to help others:::bt dey act very mean:::i feel very lonely:::help me out Hey jeff::::::m very upset wid mah attitude towards::oother:::::::::i m always der to help others:::bt dey act very mean:::i feel very lonely:::help me out

]]> By: Sally http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10344 Sally Mon, 14 Nov 2011 16:48:25 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10344 Hey Jeff.. I am an average girl. When I was younger I didn't have any interests in being popular or sociable around people but now I do. With practice I learnt how to open conversations, something I never knew before. People like me and I'm okay with that. But I have the problem of not being able to attract people or be the center of attention. I also feel very self-conscious when I talk because I feel I sound boring. I wanna be an interesting person and not be shy to do or say crazy things. I wanna be an attractive person but I dunno how. I'm sick of being just another normal friend or girl in my friends' point of view. What should I do? :@ y Hey Jeff..
I am an average girl. When I was younger I didn't have any interests in being popular or sociable around people but now I do. With practice I learnt how to open conversations, something I never knew before. People like me and I'm okay with that. But I have the problem of not being able to attract people or be the center of attention. I also feel very self-conscious when I talk because I feel I sound boring. I wanna be an interesting person and not be shy to do or say crazy things. I wanna be an attractive person but I dunno how. I'm sick of being just another normal friend or girl in my friends' point of view. What should I do? :@ y

]]> By: Jeff http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10340 Jeff Thu, 03 Nov 2011 00:58:16 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10340 Wow Travis, thanks for sharing. Your experience is extremely valuable to everyone, we really appreciate you stepping up and sharing your story with us. As you say, we all have different degrees of being shy and sometimes have to bust our butt to be more social, do things, be active, get involved and take the first step toward forming relationships - excellent advice my friend. Wow Travis, thanks for sharing. Your experience is extremely valuable to everyone, we really appreciate you stepping up and sharing your story with us. As you say, we all have different degrees of being shy and sometimes have to bust our butt to be more social, do things, be active, get involved and take the first step toward forming relationships – excellent advice my friend.

]]> By: Travis http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10339 Travis Wed, 02 Nov 2011 22:28:48 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10339 I was just strolling on by, or randomly came across this website, and I consider myself a pretty confident guy in my mid 20s that has gone from having very few friends to quite a few friends so I thought I would share my experience. In high school I was the shy type. I was know as the nice guy, everyone like me but no-one invited me too many places. I did work a lot too for a high school kid, so I'm sure that was part of it too. In college I gained the normal amount of college friends because there are so many to chose from but when everyone graduated or moved away my "friend count" went way down again. It wasn't until I really pushed myself to change that I started to get more and more people consistently wanting to be around me. I made some rules for myself as well. Rule 1) Focus on stimulating my happiness... What made me happy? Trying new things whether I'm think I'm good at them or not. So I tried online gaming, swing dancing, tennis, joined a church, went to random events, went canoeing with the DNR wildlife agency (random). If people see you having fun, they generally want to have fun too and will be more tempted to join you in the activity or a conversation. Plus, by trying new things, you gain all sorts of stories to tell about how bad you are at something or how you fell off the canoe. If you don't like trying new things, just go do what you like doing somewhere public. Again, if someone sees you having fun, they will want to have fun too. Rule 2) Don't let anger hold you back... If you are upset or having a bad day, don't let that keep you from doing something. There were several occasions where I came home so upset, but I still forced myself to get out or go do something that I enjoyed. Why? Because I knew that once I got out there doing something, I would come back happier. Even if it was just a little. I had a simple concept, I got my mind off of being sad or angry by occupying my mind with something else. One little trick I use to do is put ice cubes down my shirt when I was mad. Sounds dumb and I would normally call myself an idiot afterward, but I always laughed because it was so frickin' cold. Sometimes it would continue down my pants which made me laugh even more. Again, it was about getting my mind off my anger and onto something else no matter how dorky the method. Rule 3) You must force yourself to be social... it creates opportunities... Rule 4) Acknowledge others... Rule 5) Remember that you are not the only one that feels ignored... You can't make friends if you don't talk to anyone (I was very much like that most of my life). However, even if I didn't have anything to say, I just said hi. What makes an awkward silence awkward? Silence. If they walk away after what you said, so what. They may be gone but at least it isn't awkward anymore right? My thought was to shuck the awkwardness out of the way before it has a chance to get there. That doesn't mean scare them away, but take that chance to break the ice. Sometimes it doesn't take much. I say hi to so many people everyday that I don't even know when I get within' 4 feet of them just to keep from having that awkward silence. Doing that displays my confidence in speaking first and I acknowledge that the other person is even there, which lets them know that I care about their presence. Remember, you are not the only one that feels ignored. Everyone likes to be acknowledged. If you are the one that acknowledges that person first when they enter the room or when you enter the room, you will most likely be the person they come back to talk to if they feel ignored by everyone else. Several times I have walked into a room, just waved at someone from clear across the way that I hardly know or talk to. 10, 20 or even 30 minutes later on, they will either walk up and say hi or I will find myself standing next them and it makes it so much easier to start a conversation when I have already acknowledged their presence. They feel comfortable saying hi and starting a conversation, because in a sense, I already started it with a wave on my way in. Some people just need you to speak first. Even with my own family, I won't get a call for quite some time, and it's not because they don't like me. They just need a reminder that I am hear and do like talking to them. So, if I call any of them two or 3 days straight, they will invite me over for dinner the next week and will call me back all the time. You acknowledge their presence and they can't help but acknowledge yours. I was just strolling on by, or randomly came across this website, and I consider myself a pretty confident guy in my mid 20s that has gone from having very few friends to quite a few friends so I thought I would share my experience.

In high school I was the shy type. I was know as the nice guy, everyone like me but no-one invited me too many places. I did work a lot too for a high school kid, so I'm sure that was part of it too.

In college I gained the normal amount of college friends because there are so many to chose from but when everyone graduated or moved away my "friend count" went way down again. It wasn't until I really pushed myself to change that I started to get more and more people consistently wanting to be around me.

I made some rules for myself as well.

Rule 1)
Focus on stimulating my happiness… What made me happy? Trying new things whether I'm think I'm good at them or not. So I tried online gaming, swing dancing, tennis, joined a church, went to random events, went canoeing with the DNR wildlife agency (random). If people see you having fun, they generally want to have fun too and will be more tempted to join you in the activity or a conversation. Plus, by trying new things, you gain all sorts of stories to tell about how bad you are at something or how you fell off the canoe.

If you don't like trying new things, just go do what you like doing somewhere public. Again, if someone sees you having fun, they will want to have fun too.

Rule 2)
Don't let anger hold you back… If you are upset or having a bad day, don't let that keep you from doing something. There were several occasions where I came home so upset, but I still forced myself to get out or go do something that I enjoyed. Why? Because I knew that once I got out there doing something, I would come back happier. Even if it was just a little.

I had a simple concept, I got my mind off of being sad or angry by occupying my mind with something else. One little trick I use to do is put ice cubes down my shirt when I was mad. Sounds dumb and I would normally call myself an idiot afterward, but I always laughed because it was so frickin' cold. Sometimes it would continue down my pants which made me laugh even more. Again, it was about getting my mind off my anger and onto something else no matter how dorky the method.

Rule 3) You must force yourself to be social… it creates opportunities…
Rule 4) Acknowledge others…
Rule 5) Remember that you are not the only one that feels ignored…

You can't make friends if you don't talk to anyone (I was very much like that most of my life). However, even if I didn't have anything to say, I just said hi. What makes an awkward silence awkward? Silence. If they walk away after what you said, so what. They may be gone but at least it isn't awkward anymore right? My thought was to shuck the awkwardness out of the way before it has a chance to get there. That doesn't mean scare them away, but take that chance to break the ice. Sometimes it doesn't take much.

I say hi to so many people everyday that I don't even know when I get within' 4 feet of them just to keep from having that awkward silence. Doing that displays my confidence in speaking first and I acknowledge that the other person is even there, which lets them know that I care about their presence. Remember, you are not the only one that feels ignored.

Everyone likes to be acknowledged. If you are the one that acknowledges that person first when they enter the room or when you enter the room, you will most likely be the person they come back to talk to if they feel ignored by everyone else.

Several times I have walked into a room, just waved at someone from clear across the way that I hardly know or talk to. 10, 20 or even 30 minutes later on, they will either walk up and say hi or I will find myself standing next them and it makes it so much easier to start a conversation when I have already acknowledged their presence.

They feel comfortable saying hi and starting a conversation, because in a sense, I already started it with a wave on my way in. Some people just need you to speak first.

Even with my own family, I won't get a call for quite some time, and it's not because they don't like me. They just need a reminder that I am hear and do like talking to them. So, if I call any of them two or 3 days straight, they will invite me over for dinner the next week and will call me back all the time.

You acknowledge their presence and they can't help but acknowledge yours.

]]> By: Jeff http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10311 Jeff Wed, 14 Sep 2011 18:23:04 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10311 Thank you for sharing Imran, you make a very good point about being internally strong and self-assured enough to not be impacted by teasing, bullying, emotional blackmail and the like. Great to hear your story and continue to share your positive energy. Thank you for sharing Imran, you make a very good point about being internally strong and self-assured enough to not be impacted by teasing, bullying, emotional blackmail and the like. Great to hear your story and continue to share your positive energy.

]]> By: imran http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10309 imran Wed, 14 Sep 2011 16:26:05 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10309 hi this is imran zaindari 19 years old boy. there was some friends in my school io the same section they were always making fun of me but i never concentrated on them. I carry on with my work .well i have faced all kind of problems in my life but i never give up & today with the help of almighty allah i got hundreds of friends & everthing & i want everyone to be happy in every sitituation & enjoy every single second of your life & be positive . hi this is imran zaindari 19 years old boy. there was some friends in my school io the same section they were always making fun of me but i never concentrated on them. I carry on with my work .well i have faced all kind of problems in my life but i never give up & today with the help of almighty allah i got hundreds of friends & everthing & i want everyone to be happy in every sitituation & enjoy every single second of your life & be positive .

]]> By: Hadeea http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10305 Hadeea Mon, 12 Sep 2011 06:13:01 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10305 Thankyou to the max sir :) Thankyou to the max sir :)

]]> By: Jeff http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10304 Jeff Sat, 10 Sep 2011 12:20:27 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10304 Hi Hadia - try just working on yourself for the next few weeks. What I mean by that is write down the good things about, what people have liked about you in the past, what you know to be good traits and qualities about yourself. Study these each day, play examples over in your mind and continually force yourself to think of the "good" in you and how that has translated to relationships in the past. Do this for at least 15-20 minutes a couple times each day - the purpose here is simply to get your self-confidence back up to where it needs to be in order to project confidence, want to be around others again (despite their faults) and have them be more comfortable around you. Look, all of the others are struggling with their confidence and sel-esteem issues too...the behavior you describe of backstabbing and ignoring are symptoms of this. The key is that you create enough confidence in yourself that you KNOW you can handle any situation - even if they lash out at you because of their own challenges. Hi Hadia – try just working on yourself for the next few weeks. What I mean by that is write down the good things about, what people have liked about you in the past, what you know to be good traits and qualities about yourself. Study these each day, play examples over in your mind and continually force yourself to think of the "good" in you and how that has translated to relationships in the past. Do this for at least 15-20 minutes a couple times each day – the purpose here is simply to get your self-confidence back up to where it needs to be in order to project confidence, want to be around others again (despite their faults) and have them be more comfortable around you. Look, all of the others are struggling with their confidence and sel-esteem issues too…the behavior you describe of backstabbing and ignoring are symptoms of this. The key is that you create enough confidence in yourself that you KNOW you can handle any situation – even if they lash out at you because of their own challenges.

]]> By: Hadeea http://www.peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10303 Hadeea Sat, 10 Sep 2011 01:00:34 +0000 http://peak-personal-development.com/blog/index.php/5-ways-to-attract-people-to-you/#comment-10303 I want Friends! I have every thing, by God. But a friend is still needed. I have my Sister and her friends are my friends too. But we meet either in the start of school, in lunch time and in the end of school. In class I am alone. Every one has their own group. Everyone knows me. But I have lack of confidence to talk with them. They aren’t my type. Actually because of shuffle my old pals of old class went apart and I don’t know anything about the new mates. So I can’t talk with them they are what sometime and whatever some other time. I think most of them don’t like me. Because they are always having a problem with me. They’re totally different! I also had my group in this class, but they were mean and backstabbers. One of them gave me her ID password and I gave her mine too. One day I opened up her account and started reading the conversations with another one from our group. The conversation said that ‘that is great if I am not coming to school on Monday because I am boring and they aren’t comfortable with me’ that hurt me a lot. That was unexpected. Because in previous class they said that I add fun to their days and I am Great friend of them. I was angry that much that when I reach at school I didn’t wished them. And the truth came; when I didn’t come to them they didn’t too. Now I think I am alone. Then my sister realized my story, and she was ready to keep me with her. I love her. But everyday in class i feel out class. One day my teacher also asked 'Hadeea are your friends absent today?' I felt so disappointing. I can't engage with them. I have negative paradigms about them(I think). I feel so Uncomfortable. I am a good girl, I know. But what to do? After one day we are having a party at school and this one is my second last one. And we are having party with class mates. I don’t want to miss this day. But what will I do alone? I’ll be thankful to you if you will help me. Thanks in advance. Hadia. I want Friends!

I have every thing, by God. But a friend is still needed. I have my Sister and her friends are my friends too. But we meet either in the start of school, in lunch time and in the end of school. In class I am alone. Every one has their own group. Everyone knows me. But I have lack of confidence to talk with them. They aren’t my type. Actually because of shuffle my old pals of old class went apart and I don’t know anything about the new mates. So I can’t talk with them they are what sometime and whatever some other time. I think most of them don’t like me. Because they are always having a problem with me. They’re totally different!
I also had my group in this class, but they were mean and backstabbers. One of them gave me her ID password and I gave her mine too. One day I opened up her account and started reading the conversations with another one from our group. The conversation said that ‘that is great if I am not coming to school on Monday because I am boring and they aren’t comfortable with me’ that hurt me a lot. That was unexpected. Because in previous class they said that I add fun to their days and I am Great friend of them. I was angry that much that when I reach at school I didn’t wished them. And the truth came; when I didn’t come to them they didn’t too. Now I think I am alone. Then my sister realized my story, and she was ready to keep me with her. I love her.
But everyday in class i feel out class. One day my teacher also asked 'Hadeea are your friends absent today?' I felt so disappointing. I can't engage with them. I have negative paradigms about them(I think). I feel so Uncomfortable.
I am a good girl, I know. But what to do? After one day we are having a party at school and this one is my second last one. And we are having party with class mates. I don’t want to miss this day. But what will I do alone?
I’ll be thankful to you if you will help me.
Thanks in advance.
Hadia.

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