When you hit a point in your life or a particular situation where you lack self esteem you know the feeling…
- You immediately become withdrawn, fearful of every word, action or thought
- You feel like you are under a magnifying glass, everyone is looking and judging
- You wish you could shrivel up and escape this somehow
- Avoidance becomes your number 1 defense mechanism, stay away from situations, people or places where you know your self esteem is low
- You lose faith and hope wondering if things will ever change
- You feel trapped in your own life, you can't live like you want to…your low self-esteem always seems to hold you back from the friends, events and results you want to get in life
Any of this sound familiar?
It should, we all suffer from low self confidence and self esteem at different times and situations in life…since the problem isn't going away and the limitations low self confidence place on your life are so large, why wouldn't you spend a few minutes learning the top ways to improve your self esteem overnight?
Inside Attracting Greatness, the 5 Pillars of Greatness demonstrated consistently by the top achievers in life around the world depends heavily on being able to control and reverse low self esteem, now you will have some of the best ways at your finger tips.
1. Focus on what you do well. Properly developed self-esteem should come from within (not motivated from what others do or say about you). To lay the proper foundation you want to pick 1 or 2 things that you really appreciate about yourself…this will break the constant habit of finding the negative in you toward recognizing the positive.
2. What have you contributed...in the same vein, write down 2-3 things that you have contributed to friends, family or strangers that you are proud of? These could be as simple as "being there" listening during troubled times, helping someone in some way, spending time, referring a resource or something more involved such as advice, assistance or performing a service for someone.
3. Create a movie from #1 & 2 – ideally this is a 30s to 1-minute "clip" that you can play on-demand in your brain over and over again during your day…when you wake up, breaks, whenever you feel down, before heading to bed, etc… You are countering your negative programming with positive programming that will help boost your self esteem
4. Change your social circle – most of us spend too much time around people who tear us down instead of those that make us comfortable and build us up. You want to consciously develop a list of people that are most negative toward your self esteem and those that are more positive committing today to change the ratio of time spent to favor those that help improve our self esteem versus those that tear it down
5. Read about inspirational, motivational people that overcame great odds…these people will have HAD to have relied on high self confidence, you can draw inspiration and learn how they managed to tackle their own self confidence issues to achieve great things in life
6. Seek out role models that have relied on their own internal self confidence, often in the face of great adversity and in direct opposition to many who tried to hold them back due to ignorance or jealousy or their own lack of self esteem.
7. Create your own "ideal" life in alignment with your core purpose. Don't be afraid to envision a life that is driven by confidence without limit. Up until now many of us dream small and create low expectations for ourselves out of fear that our confidence will not allow us to achieve the greatness that exists within us
8. Develop a new reality by creating "I am…" statements. So instead of "I am an average parent (or worker, spouse, friend, etc…), try "I am a confident, purpose-driven and happy parent that transfers these positive traits to my children every day" . Of course, you want to develop your own custom "I am" statements in accordance with the areas of your life you are focusing your attention to boost your self esteem
9. Add "certain belief" to your "I am" statements. Developing positive "I am" affirmations certainly will impact how your brain develops (assuming you read these to yourself 2-3 times daily over a period of time), but to really kick things into high gear, you want to support these statements with certain belief…you can do this by sheer repetition, but you can also reinforce with proof from mentors, inspirational figures, proof from your own life in the past, etc… Affirmations supported by certainty make the biggest impact on your life in the shortest time.
10. Make attention to your self esteem a daily habit. Where most people fail in an attempt to make significant change in their lives (personality, emotionally, physically, etc…) is with inconsistency. Decide to start making change today by adopting these 10 tips, but also promise yourself that these will become a new habit for the next 30-days, from there you will have engrained these new lifestyle methods into practice so that maintaining a healthy self esteem becomes as common as eating, drinking and breathing.
Do you have an area of your life where you could really boost your self esteem and see a big change? Leave a comment and then start using the 10-steps today.